Favorite Funny Signs III

Translation: Don't let your child run into the street. Right? So...

This one says...Don't hold hands. You must let your child run into the street.

These photos courtesy of my daughter. Thanks, sweetie!

My Happiness Habit: The Truly Happy Life

"The truly happy life consists of looking to you (God) for happiness, seeking it from you and through you. This is the only path to true joy. Those who think happiness is to be found in some other way are pursuing a different false version of it, but in their minds they still retain some image of the true joy...The happy life is joy based on truth...Why then are they not happy? Perhaps it is because they are engrossed in things that make them wretched and only have a dim memory of that which would give them joy." -The Confessions of St. Augustine

Anything I might add would only dilute the words of this great old saint. Savor them slowly and enjoy.

Soul Needs and Strip Mall Stuff

I have a funny habit. I like to sit down like a toddler with a pair of scissors and a pile of magazines and cut them up. I cut out pretty pictures I like and any words or phrases that capture my fancy. I don't pause to analyze my reasons for liking them or how they could be used. I put my scraps away for a few days or a few weeks. Some day when I have the time I pull them back out, arrange the clippings into a collage, and stick them in my journal. It is fun for me to see how the pictures and words can be scattered across a page to express the current state of my heart and spirit.

Cutting and pasting is slower than scribbling a few sentences in my journal, so I always wind up feeling like I have spent an hour playing. I think the leisurely pace of this activity is one of the things that draws me back to it. Like most Americans my life often flies too fast.

Epiphany
Today as I indulged in this guilty pleasure I was struck by something. I finished taping down "start your journey" and "discover strength", and was looking for places to put "bountiful" and "inspired" when I had my little epiphany. The words and phrases were cut out from ads peddling everything from menopause medication to rental car agencies. But, the longings they were promising to fill were much more significant.


The ads were promising to fill soul needs with strip mall stuff. In a way it makes sense. We people are remarkably persistent. Like too-small fish, we continue to bite the hooks, hoping that this time we will swim away satisfied instead of being reeled in again. 

It will never work. Soul needs can only be satisfied by soul food.

Anxious Politicians and Happy Beggars

"I was preparing to deliver a speech in praise of  ___ . I was to tell many lies that would be enjoyed by people who would know full well that they were not the truth. My heart pounded with anxiety..."

Is it quote from a interview conducted on this morning's news? Was he about to speak at a fundraising dinner for a candidate for running for office in the upcoming election? Actually, it is a bit older than that. The speaker was about to make a speech about the Emperor of Rome, in the fourth century. 

All of our technology notwithstanding, not much has changed.

Augustine continued his story.

I noticed a destitute beggar who, I think, was already drunk, because he was joking and laughing...All our efforts...were directed at nothing more than the attainment of a state of carefree pleasure. But the beggar got there first... For what he had gained with a few coins got by begging - namely, the pleasure of temporary happiness - I was striving to find in such distressingly twisted and roundabout ways.

Not that the beggar possessed true joy; but my method of seeking fulfillment through corrupt practices was far more false. Certainly he was cheerful while I was anxious; he was carefree while I was filled with apprehension. If anyone were to ask me whether I would prefer to be cheerful or afraid, I would answer, 'to be cheerful'. But if I were then asked whether I would prefer to be like the beggar or like myself, as I was at the time, I would choose to be myself, though consumed by anxieties and fears. (The Confessions of St. Augustine,"A Beggar's Happiness")

The more things change, the more they stay the same.  Beggars and politicians alike, we are still striving after the wrong thing, and looking for it in all the wrong places.

Risk Assessment

When I was growing up we raised Arabian horses and broke them for riding. Actually, I use "we" very loosely. My dad did all the work.

When I was little he would sometimes set me on the back of a young horse before it was ready to bear the weight of an adult. The colts and fillies had to gradually adjust to having something on their back. First a blanket, then a saddle, then me. Some horses were scared by the feeling of having something on their back. Some of them were just plain angry.

I vividly remember one horse. Her name was "Lacey". She was skittish. Daddy worked for weeks just to get her to accept the blanket on her back. Finally the day came that he judged her to be ready for me. He gingerly put me on her back. He had one hand on Lacey's halter and the other on me. The horse startled and took one long sideways leap about 10 feet across the corral, taking both me and my dad with her. A moment later, as we blinked in stunned surprise at suddenly finding ourselves on the opposite side of the enclosure, we both burst out laughing.

I wasn't really scared, even though we really could have been badly injured by that crazy horse. I think the reason was that my dad had a tight grip on me throughout the entire flight.

Choosing to love is like riding on the back of that horse. I might get thrown off. I could even get seriously injured. However, I believe that Jesus was the one who put me here and he still has a tight hold on me. Wherever I go, He will still be right there with me.

Jesus never sat down with his disciples and said, "Now listen, you guys be careful out there. Otherwise you could get hurt..." Actually He did the very opposite. He promised them that if they were following Him, they would get hurt. And, He promised them that He would be with them in it.

Loving deeply is a very dangerous thing to do. It is going to hurt. Sometimes it is going to hurt a lot.
We should be wise and thoughtful about our choices; what we choose to do, who we choose to love. Goggles and safety helmets definitely have their place. I think a person should pray constantly and be sure of what God is calling them to do.

After that, it is time to let Him lift you onto the back of that horse and hold on.

This post will also be published on http://doorinthewilderness.blogspot.com/

My Happiness Habit: Something Honorable

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable...think about these things. Philippians 4:8

I have been searching the news for things that are worth thinking about.

While still trapped far underground, Lois Urzua, the 54 year old shift foreman of the San Jose Mine in Copiapa Chile, described the collapse that trapped him and his crew in the mine.

"It was frightening. We felt like the mountain was coming down on us, without knowing what happened. Thanks to God, we still hadn't gathered together to go out to have lunch. ... At 20 minutes before 2 (their usual lunch hour), the mountain came down on top of us."

Before the dust had even settled Urzua directed most of the men to huddle while he and three others scouted.
"For about four or five hours, we couldn't see a thing. After that we saw that we were trapped by an enormous rock that filled the entire passage of the tunnel."

After ascertaining the gravity of their situation, he began the difficult task of keeping his men alive. For the next 17 days, he limited each man to 2 spoonfuls of tuna fish and a half a glass of milk every 48 hours.

Luiz drew detailed maps, divided work, sleep and sanitary areas, and used the headlights of mining trucks to simulate sunlight. After a 6 inch hole was finally bored from the surface, he worked with experts outside the mine to keep his men healthy physically, and mentally. He kept the miners on their 12 hour shifts in order to do what they could from below to prepare for their rescue. More than 2 months after the collapse all 33 men were finally brought to the surface, alive. Luiz came up last. 

In my opinion the leadership this man showed in an apparently hopeless situation is worth thinking about.

(Information from guardian.co.uk, www.livescience.com, and the Associated Press.)

My Happiness Habit: What in the World is Truth?

Whatever is true...think on these things." Phil 4:8
I have been pursuing developing a habit of happiness.

Today I am planning to think more about Paul's assertion that our thought life makes a difference. He says we should choose to think about "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just..."

That got me thinking, if I am going to thing about things that are true, I need to be able to tell the difference between truth and lies.

Truth in Political Ads?
This morning I turned on the TV. I was immediately barraged by ads bashing the candidates running for office. The first ad was so damming that it made me wonder why this guy is running for congress instead of sitting in jail.  The next ad was praising the same guy, making him sound like he should be sainted next week. What is a voter to do? How am I supposed to know what is true?

Truth from the Mexican Police
The news story that came up next was related to the couple who was jet skiing on a lake on the Texas/Mexico border a couple of weeks ago. The husband was shot and killed. A few days ago the lead Mexican investigator announced that they had a couple of suspects, leaders of a drug cartel. The day after that, his bosses announced that contrary to the earlier announcement, there were no suspects. the leaders of the drug cartel had been cleared. A few days later that investigator showed up at an army base, at least his head did.  It was in a suitcase.  Suspicious.  What is the truth?

What is truth?
Philosophers debate truth.
Some people don't believe that anything is ultimately true.
How can I know what is true? 

In the middle of a different type of terrible situation, Jesus was being interrogated by a corrupt, self-serving, high government official. (Hmmm thousands of years pass, yet this seems as familiar as today's news.)

Jesus said, "For this purpose I have come into the world - to bear witness to the truth. Everyone who is of the truth listens to my voice." (John 18:37)

Truth was pretty hard to find on the TV this morning.
If I want to think about the truth, I won't really find it on major news outlets. Once again everything comes around to Jesus. The only place I can find reliable truth is by listening to him.

Hindu Gongs and Christian Prayer Chains

The gate
I vividly remember my first visit to a Hindu temple in India.  Outside, we made our way past the crowds of desperate humanity at the gate; the pleading mothers holding naked infants, the horribly misshapen children, the weary old men.  Each one broke my heart; I felt totally helpless in the face of such need. I couldn't even hand them a rupee or two. We had been instructed not to give them money because their activities are controlled by pimps who take the money they are given and pocket it themselves.

Getting the gods' attention
The first thing we encountered inside was a large gong. Our guide explained that worshipers sound the gong when they enter in order to attract the attention of the gods.  If the worshiper didn't ring the gong, the gods might overlook him or her.  Worshipers have to go to great lengths to get the attention of their indifferent gods.

Are Christians so different?
We Christians have a practice that reminds me a bit of the Hindu gong. We handle small problems in private prayer but, when a big problem arises we try to get as many people to pray as possible.  We put the request out on prayer chains and make phone calls and write emails and put it on our status update on Facebook. Then we reassure the person who is suffering that there are a lot of people praying.

Is God reluctant to care for us?
Why do we do this?  Is it because God might ignore a request if I ask for something for myself, but if there are a lot of people asking him for something he will sigh deeply and reluctantly intervene on my behalf? Is His love for me a reluctant love? Does He keep a count and say, "If there were only 10 people praying I would say no, but because there are a hundred people praying I will do what you ask?" Is God, like the Hindu gods, easily distracted, but if we get a lot of people to pray it will be like a gong in His ears and He will rouse Himself and look around and see who is making so much noise?

Fortunately,  the one true God is nothing like that. I am so grateful that my God promises to be with me all the time. He loves me. He even knows the number of hairs on my head.  I definitely don't have to ring a gong to get his attention.

So why do I ask people to pray?

The followers of Christ have always asked for prayer.  When the apostle Paul was suffering he asked people to pray, "You also must help us by prayer..." We ask people to pray because through prayer we stand together against the darkness. It is a way of helping each other.  Humans are not meant to be alone.  We need people to help us bear our burdens. After all, we are all part of one body.  An individual cell can't survive alone.

Another reason
Paul also had another reason for asking for prayer. "so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many." (2 Cor. 1:11)

We also ask others to pray because we are absolutely confident that God is going to be good to us. We pray because when we do the work of prayer together we get to marvel at God's faithfulness to us together.  We get to share each other's blessings.

So, no gongs are needed, but we are very necessary to each other. By asking people to bear our burdens with us, we give them a great gift, sharing in the joy of God's fathomless love for us.

The Care and Feeding of Teenage Boys: Final Installment

Here is the final installment of the conversation between my sisters and me about raising teenagers, especially boys. See the Care and Feeding...: Part 1 for the email that started us off.

Brain Damage
The comment that may prove to be the most helpful actually came from my daughter, an older and wiser teen of 18.
"My science teacher told us that all teenagers have brain damage.  The part of the brain that registers pleasure is disconnected from the part of the brain that thinks logically."

That explains a lot.


Advice from Sister #3  
Dear Nae,

I agree with our sisters. You have me laughing. The things you describe sound just like what happened at my house a few years ago.  I think you are doing great.  I wish I had the magic "this will set the world right" piece of advice, but I don't. 

I feel like saying of Cal's teen years ..."It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..."  Those were originally Charles Dickens' words.  He was talking about the French revolution.  Teen years with the male of the species are like a revolution I guess.  They go from being dependent little boys to being men strong enough to take on the world, all in the space of a few short years.  No wonder it gets bloody at times. 

I think my advice is:

•   Love him, but don't feel guilty if you don't always like him. 

• Take advantage of the good times and enjoy him when you can.  There are delightful things about boys that age, some days.  

• Choose your battles.  If it isn't going to do permanent harm to him or someone else, it might not be worth the fight.  

• Offer him all the food, water and exercise he needs. 

• Take care of yourself too. You will probably be able to handle the music, and chaos, and attitude, and nonsense better if you are well rested, well fed, and laugh often.  I highly recommend date nights or escaping with your big sister.

I love you, Nae.

Disclaimer:  These notes were written to be read only by my sisters and myself.  If we sound advice-y, it is because we are big sisters talking to a little sister, and we can't help it. Besides, she asked for it. In contrast to the way we might sound, we are all mature enough to know that we don't really know anything anymore. 

The Care and Feeding of Teenage Boys Part 3

Last Friday I posted one of the responses my sisters and I sent after our youngest sister asked for advice about raising teenage boys (See Care and Feeding Part 1).  Here is the second response. 

Dear Nae,

I am laughing!

I am not sure what the problem is that you what advice on.
It all sounds pretty normal.

I would say is pick your battles. And in my opinion, clean rooms, texting etc aren’t worth the fight.  I am guessing there will big bigger battles later. But I was pretty lax and later thought I should have been stricter. Others may have different protocols they want to want to maintain.

Moods are normal. He is loved no matter how he feels about it .

My experiences is that kids will tell you want to do the rest of your life. Get used to it but with no obligation to actually show up and pay for everything.

You are doing a great job! Just buy more peanut butter.

I am looking forward to what my sisters say.

Thanks for the email. I had a friend tell me that when we are raising teenagers it is the hardest time to maintain honest friendships because we are all so embarrassed by how our kids are acting. But it sounds like to me your kid is doing great!

Disclaimer:  These notes were written to be read only by my sisters and myself.  If we sound advice-y, it is because we are big sisters talking to a little sister, and we can't help it. Besides, she asked for it. In contrast to the way we might sound, we are all mature enough to know that we don't really know anything anymore.

A Conversation Between Sisters About Parenting: The Care and Feeding of Teenage Boys part II

I have 3 sisters.

Recently the four of us had a conversation over email about parenting teenage boys.  I shared the note that started this conversation with you last week (See The Care and Feeding of Teenage Boys Part 1).  Over the next several blog posts I plan to show you the rest of the conversation.

Disclaimer:  These notes were written to be read only by my sisters and myself.  If we sound advice-y, it is because we are big sisters talking to a little sister, and we can't help it. Besides, she asked for it. In contrast to the way we might sound, we are all mature enough to know that we don't really know anything anymore.

Dear Nae,

I had it explained to me once that children are like dogs when they are young, they run to you with bundles of joy when you enter a room, love to spend time with you and go into clouds of joy when you treat them with something as simple as an ice cream cone.  Then, around age 12 or 13 they turn to be more like cats, aloof, they will come if you put out food, and it takes a small loan to buy a gift that really thrills them.  However, if you can make it through the "cat years"  they come back as loyal, grown children who respect and appreciate their parents.

The teenage years are hard.  We had many a "discussion", many worried prayers going up for those years.  Now, our sons are our friends.

You have done an excellent job.  Your son has a good foundation.  As he figures life out, he will have his ups and downs, but the superb parenting you have given will pay off.

During the teen years, a boy is trying to become a man.  He naturally looks to his Dad as to how to do that.  Both our boys pushed away from me and sought male leadership.  A friend of mine told me that they had to push their Mom away for a time to establish their own independence.  Know in your heart that you will always have (your son's) love, he is just trying to figure life out and it isn't easy.

I so respect you as a Mother.  You do a really awesome job!

Hang in there, little sis!  Maybe in years to come you can buy an RV and run away, visit when you want to! All kidding aside.  I will be praying for you.  It can be pretty tough on a Mom's heart for a while. 

I love you.

Overpowering Winds vs. Deep Roots

Trees at Timberline

 At timberline on the high mountain peaks near my home there are beautiful trees. These trees are survivors.  They grow high on rocky slopes where hurricane force winds, vicious cold, and ferocious blizzards threaten them routinely.  Their trunks are twisted and their growth stunted by the difficult growing conditions, but they survive because they have roots that are deep and strong, sheltered by rocks.  Many of these trees are hundreds or even thousands of years old.  They live longer than trees growing in much more hospitable conditions.  

From Henry Photos http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/view?q=Bristlecone%20Pine&psc=G&filter=1#5369309897803670802

Storms Near and Far
It has been a terribly stormy week for many of my dear friends and family.  Within the space of a couple of days I have been told about numerous overpowering sorrows.

There is a newborn baby who spent his first several days outside the womb fighting for his life.
There are teenagers scattered near and far, determined to be stupid.  They are climbing over and digging under all of the boundaries that were erected to keep them alive.
There are older people suffering from debilitating or life-threatening illnesses.
There are family relationships strained by selfishness and addiction.
Many of the people I love are dealing with more than one of these problems at the same time.  It seems too much to bear.  It is crushing.

More Than We Can Bear
I have heard well meaning Christians, trying to be helpful, say "God won't give us more than we can bear. So He must think you are pretty strong."  Actually, not to be dismal here, but God never promises that he won't give us bigger problems than we can bear.  He promises not to allow us to be tempted beyond what we are able to bear, but that is not the same thing.

Judging by 2 Corinthians 1:3-10, people are often burdened with problems too big for them. If there has ever been a human who should have been able to handle all the problems that were thrown at him, you would think that the apostle Paul would be that man. But he said, "We were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself..." Paul's problems were so terrible that even he "despaired of life".

Hope
Fortunately, for us, Paul did not stop there.  He contrasted his own despair with God's power over death and revealed one reason that God sometimes does allow us to suffer beyond what we are able to bear.
  

"...But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On Him we have set our hope that He will deliver us again." 

My Prayer
So, for every one of those I love, who are utterly burdened beyond their strength, here is the prayer I am praying for you.

My Father of Mercies, My God of all comfort,
These problems are too much for us, they are crushing us. We can't fix them, and we don't know how to escape from them.  But You are the God who raises the dead.  Even if our problems are so crushing that we despair of life itself, you are more than strong enough.  We choose to put our roots down deep into you. Thank you that you are near to us. These problems will cause us to rely on you and not on ourselves.  You have delivered us before.  Help us again.  Have mercy, Father of Mercies. Comfort us, God of all comfort.  Our roots are driving deeper into you.  Our hope is in you and only in you.
Amen

"The tree on the mountain takes whatever the weather brings.  If it has any choice at all it is in putting down roots as deeply as possible."  Corrie Ten Boom

My Happiness Habit: Uncensored

This happiness habit thing has not been as easy for me as I expected it to be. I characterize myself as a person who is generally happy. But as soon as I started to be intentional about developing a consistent habit of happiness, it seemed to elude my grasp, like trying to capture a bubble in my hand. 

Every time I get close to capturing happiness, some difficulty arises in my life and my fragile soap bubble seems to pop.  I am not giving up though.  Some habits are tougher to develop than others, I guess.

So far, I have thought about intentionally rejoicing in the Lord, recognizing that He is near, not allowing myself to be anxious, but praying about my fears instead.  These are all good things and I stand by them.

I am going to keep practicing until I get things right, but I have not arrived.   I am finding that most of the paths I trudge are simple to communicate, and much more difficult to walk.

Life is messy.  Even good seasons in life are messy.  During other seasons, the word painful doesn't even begin to cover it.  I don't want to sound like true Christians will never feel sad, discouraged or clinically depressed.  Actually, God acknowledges that at times we are going to feel crushed.  He promises to come live with us and bring us back to life (more on this in the next few days on my other blog, http://blogspot.doorinthewilderness.com ).  

During those times when happiness doesn't come easily, one more little key seems to be fighting to maintain perspective.

I tend to lose perspective.  When I am struggling I see only the trouble. I don't seem to be able to contain the joys and the sorrows at the same time.

The Psalms are good guides in this.  David repeatedly rails at his enemies, describes his desperate situation, and asks God to come to his defense.  He even prays that God will "break the teeth in their mouths" and "let them be like the snail that dissolves into slime" (Psalm 58).  And those are mild calls for vengeance! Some Psalms get much bloodier.  I find all the calls for divine violence oddly comforting.  Praying for God dissolve my enemies into slime is further than I am willing to go most of the time, except when I am really angry. I figure the fact that such talk is in holy scripture gives me permission to be real in my own prayers. I can honestly pour out my feelings to God uncensored. 

In almost every one of these Psalms, two other things happen also.  The writer remembers specific aspects of God's character and times that God has been faithful in the past.  He prays honest, emotion filled "dissolve into slime" prayers and then a few breaths later he brings himself back around to the things he knows to be true, and the faithfulness he has experienced in the past.

I love how realistic God is about us.  He knows that to 'rejoice always' is not easy.  He knows that we need to both lay everything out before Him, and force ourselves to remember who He is and what He has done for us. Maybe that is why Philippians 4:6 says that while we are passionately pouring out every anxiety to the Lord in prayer, we are to be mixing the requests with thanksgiving.

"prayer and supplication with thanksgiving"(Philippians 4:6)

"Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully." (1 Peter 5:7, AMP)

Favorite Funny Signs II

The Care and Feeding of Teenage Boys

Last week I received an email from my youngest sister about the perils of raising a teenage boy.  I think she is insightful, and so far she has held onto her sense of humor.  I asked her if I could post it for you to read.

Dear Sisters,

I am aware that being the youngest came with certain perks. One is that I could learn from your lives, without having to actually do things myself.... Which brings me to the purpose for this letter.

Between you, you have successfully raised 6 boys.  They are wonderful young men that I am proud to call my nephews.  You have beyond succeeded in raising them.   I believe it was Connie who said, "successful parenting is when your children can pay for their own therapy".  I am now wondering who will pay for mine.

My dear baby boy has disappeared.  He does occasionally re-appear, but I do wonder if he is suddenly schizophrenic.  We have days of wonderful smiles and life is good, and then days where I am the enemy and I was wrong for getting out of bed in the morning.  

Lately things have been good. As I write, the music coming from his room is so loud that it rattles the air vents. Thankfully, it is a good song and he is playing his guitar, with it. This is how I justify both the loud music and the guitar lessons. The smell coming from his room is another story.

Today I went to Costco and loaded up on food. All of which I expect to either be in his room or in his stomach before the end of the week. Literally he needs to eat every 2-3 hours or we have blood sugar crashes that bring us right back to the part where I should stay in bed, unless I'd like to get up to feed him or take him somewhere. 

Please don't get me wrong. I love him dearly. I am proud of him. He gets good grades, tells us where he is and adores his dad, (Who unlike our Dad is not one to talk about things that are not tangible.  If it is a feeling, emotion of any sort, or a plan to be made, it is my department.) He doesn't lie to us (about important things)... I don't think.  All of these things are good, and normal.  I am hoping you can give me some advice on raising boys.  Since I am the youngest of 4 girls, I think I am out of my element with a teenage boy. 

Watching You Tube videos and texting are a part of his life that he believes is a part of  'doing homework'.    Maybe it is the homeschooler in me, but I just don't see how his grades stay high when he studies like that.   I am finding that he has very nice friends. I like them as much as one likes 13 and 14 year old boys. He is outside a lot, riding his bike.... without a seat... or a helmet...usually on one wheel. He doesn't believe shoe laces are to be tied, they are a fashion statement. He does have a hilarious sense of humor and often has us all rolling.  He goes to youth group, which can be good or bad. After all, they are all 13 year olds. I trust the leaders and like them, as does he. 

He loves a schedule and does well if we make sure he knows what is happening in his future. This is only fair, I understand. This need to schedule, however has translated lately into him telling me where I will be at what time and with what amount of money to give him. Is this a leadership skill?  Did I need to be led?  Should I clean his room for him? Do I REALLY want to know what is in there?

I do believe this will pass, and we will be fine. I also believe we are blessed and he will not be as difficult as many teens. Except with speed and engines he generally has good judgement. I'm learning to give him more space and less lecture. I am working to treat him with adult respect instead of the 'mom voice'.  I am always here for him to talk, but won't force him to.  Yet... he is 13, not 18 and not at all  as wise as he thinks he is. 

SO, I am hoping for the practical kind of advice, (feed him peanut butter and oatmeal 10 times a day)  or the encouraging kind of advice (.... I got nothin' that is why I am writing you) rather than the old lady helping advice ( oh dear, they grow up so fast, enjoy these days... Bleck )

I love you and cherish your advice and the encouragement in knowing you are all still sane, and have relationships with your grown boys.    Maybe you have ways to keep him from eating all the ice cream as well... Thank you!  

Love,

Nae

I think my sister is doing great in the tricky job of parenting a teenage boy. This letter brought back memories.  Thinking back, the memories fill my heart with warmth.  I think it is the same syndrome that causes mothers to relate horror stories of labor and delivery to pregnant women.  Somehow, looking back at it, the memories make you feel good even though at the time the pain made you want to die.

When my kids were newborns and couldn't do anything but eat and sleep and poop,  I knew all about how to parent well. I freely dispensed advice. Over the years, I broke all of my own rules and today I know much, much less about what works in parenting than I did before I tried it for myself. Since I was blessed by easy kids to raise, I still have a couple of little pieces of advice left to give.  If I work up the courage to post that advice I will have to do it very soon because because I have two step-kids approaching teen years and by the time they reach their 18th birthdays my last few little things I think I know about parenting will have evaporated too. 

If you, dear reader, still have advice to give or would like to commiserate feel free to comment!